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[Note: This is actually something I wrote a long time ago. It was on a forum I went to a lot at the time in response to a previous poster talking about how MvC2 teams were generally constructed (and making gross generalizations). I wrote this in response, which won’t hold up under a microscope but gives a general overview of teambuilding with a few specific examples. I’m reposting it here so I can find it more easliy in the future. Enjoy!]
I remember when MvC3 was announced, an old MvC2 pro, Fanatiq, did a writeup on the four main kinds of teams in MvC2: Rushdown, Zoning, DHC, and Trap. These four teams played very differently and because of that they had to be structured very differently. And because I don’t want to do any real work for the next 3 hours, I’m going to go over their general structures in detail.
Rushdown – Exactly what it says on the tin. These teams are about opening up the opponent and getting them into extremely damaging combos. Characters with high mobility, strong combos or infinites, and assists that can help start or extend combos are all strongly reccommended for these types of teams. Meter building is not an issue because landing combos will do more damage than just a simple DHC usually.
General team structure: Rushdown character/Rushdown character you can DHC into/Combo starting or extending assist.
Example: MSP (Magneto-A/Storm-A or B/Psylocke-A) – Magneto is
so pringles the embodiment of everything rushdown in MvC2. He has incredible mobility, great combos, unparalleled resets, big range on his fast snapback, and is a good meter builder and starter for DHCs. Magneto’s assist, though rarely used on this team, is also very good for punishing since it goes full screen very quickly and leaves Magneto at a very safe distance away. If Magneto’s resets and ROM infinite don’t kill characters or if Magneto is low on health then he can combo into Magnetic Tempest and DHC into Hailstorm to bring Storm in to do what she does best – build meter and punish opponent’s mistakes. After Storm puts in some work and Magnus has gotten some health back, she can punish with safe Hailstorms, DHC into Psylocke’s Butterfly super, and DHC again to get back to Magneto. Storm’s Typhoon assist is used because it handily goes through other projectiles and does decent damage, but Lightning Attack can also be used to set up unblockables. Psylocke’s Psyblade assist is phenomenal both as an anti-air and a combo starter because of its high amount of invincibility and because it leaves the opponent in the perfect position for Magneto to launch into a ROM infinite. Psylocke is also a decent character on her own, with good mobility, solid DHCs, and a soft corner trap.
Other Example: Team Combofiend (Magneto-A/Iron Man-B/Sentinel-Y) – A team that was originally used by Combofiend and is still used by Josh360, this team is a good example of a modern Iron Man team. I already talked about Magneto so I won’t say much about him other than that combos into Tempest with this team lead well into Iron Man’s Proton Cannon. Iron Man is like a slightly slower Magneto with only one very inflexible super. Tony Stark has similar mobility, mixups, combos, and resets as well as some fun stuff like guard breaks, but isn’t seen as much because Magneto is just a better character overall. One area where Iron Man excels more than Magneto is in his Repulsor Blast assist, which is a great combo extender for both Magneto and Sentinel. Speaking of Sentinel, Proton Cannon can combo well into Hyper Sentinel Force which Sentinel can then loop with the meter built up over time by Magneto and Iron Man. Sentinel can also do fly/unfly combos with both Magneto’s Disruptor assist and Iron Man’s Repulsor Blast assist. This allows Sentinel’s already high damage output to become even greater. Overall, this team is less an example of having one really strong assist and more of an example of having three characters that have assists that work well with each other.
Zoning – Another straightforward archetype. Zoning teams want to control space as much as they can and basically play the whole game like it’s Super Turbo with flying robots. Assists are extremely important to defensive teams, specifically assists that can control a lot of space. Characters with fast projectiles, projectiles that cover a lot of the screen both horizontally and vertically, and powerful beam supers are important to zoning teams.
General team structure: Zoning character/Projectile assist/Anti-air assist
Example: Team Scrub (Cable-B/Sentinel-Y/Captain Commando-B) – Just as Magneto is the quintessential rushdown character, Cable is the quintessential zoning character. Cable has a quick gunshot projectile, a slower beam projectile that covers more space, a grenade projectile that can put the opponent in lots of hitstun or blockstun, guard breaks, good enough mobility to not get locked down, a solid DP that is also a projectile, and, most famously, a full screen hyper that he can do up to 5 times in a row. Cable’s assist is a great anti-air and very good for Sentinel when he’s playing footsies in the air with other Sentinels or Storms. Sentinel himself is a great zoner in addition to having massively damaging combos. With drones, a nearly full-screen Rocket Punch, the ability to punish with Hyper Sentinel Force loops, and massive range on every move he has (except standing LK, but who uses that?), Sentinel can play the bait and punish game just as well as Cable, if not better. Sentinel’s drones assist works well with Cable as they stay on screen for a long time and can control the bottom half of the screen while Cable controls the top half with gunshots, grenades, and Viper Beams. Speaking of controlling the top half of the screen, Captain Commando’s Captain Corridor assist will make air footsies skew heavily in your favor. Both Cable and Sentinel benefit from having a Corridor cover a huge vertical column on their screen for them, but Sentinel benefits even more as Commando’s assist can extend his fly combos and potentially turn them into one-touch kills. However, on his own Commando can’t do much besides build meter to try and DHC back into one of the other characters.
Other Examples: Team Watts (Blackheart-B/Sentinel-Y/Captain Commando-B) and Watts 2.0 (Blackheart-B/Cable-B/Sentinel-Y) – In general, Blackheart is valued as a zoning character for his ability to spit gargoyles at his opponent which slowly drain their health. Blackheart also has a solid projectile game and can control air space very well with Inferno, although its comparatively slow speed makes it slightly less useful than Captain Corridor. He even has a soft trap with Sentinel’s Drones assist. Both of these teams offer different benefits, with the original Watts placing more emphasis on Sentinel’s abilities and fly combos and Watts 2.0 allowing the opportunity for Cable to enter the fray. The original has the advantage of being able to control the air better but the sequel has the advantage of allowing two characters to be able to take advantage of Sentinel’s drones assist.
DHC – One of the core mechanics of MvC2 is the ability to combo one character’s hyper combo into one of their partner’s hyper combos instantly. This process is known as the delayed hyper combo, or DHC. In MvC2, not all DHCs are created equal and there are specific teams built around the best DHCs in the game. In a DHC team, meter management is crucial, so the best DHC teams have a character who can build meter well. Ideally, this character starts the DHC, but this is not always the case. If the meter builder is one of the two characters who starts the DHC, the third character will likely be a character who can either benefit one of the two DHC characters with a strong assist, or a character who benefits from the assists of one or both of the existing characters.
General team structure: DHC starter/DHC ender/Character who can build meter or benefit the other two in some way
Example: Santhrax (Storm-A/Sentinel-Y/Captain Commando-B) – Remember that part in “Mahvel Baybee 2” where Yipes says “That’s 90%, welcome to USA *****“? He was talking about the Storm/Sentinel DHC that Santhrax and a laundry list of other teams are built around. Storms basic launcher combo ending in two Lightning Attacks and a Lightning Storm super put her in the perfect position to DHC into Sentinel’s Hyper Sentinel force, which then leads to loops, launches, mixups, and other really fun stuff. Storm is also one of the best characters in the game at running away and building meter as well as being a fast character who can punish well, making her a great lead in the combo. The third character in this specific team is Captain Commando, whose assist is used to help Sentinel and Storm control air space, but there are a ton of variants of the basic Storm/Sentinel combo – MSS uses Magneto to lead and Storm and Sentinel to follow up, Cody uses Cable as an anti-air assist and sometimes as a lead, Matrix uses Cyclops’ assist to put opponents in massive blockstun and punish other assists, one of Justin Wong’s early teams used Cammy as an anti-air, hell you could use Storm/Sentinel/Roll and do decently (although you’re really screwed if one of your good characters dies). Storm/Sentinel is one of if not the best DHCs in the game and because of that Santhrax and its many variations are some of the most common teams at tournament level play.
Other Example: Team Z (Juggernaut-Y/Tron-Y/Dr. Doom-B) – Bet you didn’t expect me to talk about this, did you? Team Z is a team that is generally pretty balanced in that it can employ solid offensive pressure with Juggernaut backed by assists, zone solidly with Doom, and trap opponent’s with Tron’s drill backed by Doom’s rocks. What makes this team notable, though, is its DHCs, or more notably, its DHCs into Juggernaut. Juggernaut’s Head Crush super doesn’t damage scale much, if at all, which makes a lot of this team’s combos with Tron and Doom one-touch kills or close to it. Juggernaut’s massive damaging ability, Tron’s extremely helpful assist and Lunch Rush super, and Doom’s rocks, powerful combos, and zoning skill all build upon the strength of the DHCs to make this an incredibly solid and fun low-tier team.
Trap – Do you like blocking? You better if your opponent is playing a trap team. Trap teams utilize blockstrings or fast projectiles to get the opponent to block a lot so that they can build meter, mix them up, or just chip them out. Like with DHCs, good traps are very specific and depend on the specific characters, which means that there isn’t any general rule for making them. However, having a character who can compensate for the other characters’ weaknesses, a character who can create pseudo-traps or slightly weaker versions of the main trap, or a character who can build or use meter depending on what your team needs, are generally very helpful. Some could argue that trap teams are subgenres of rushdown or zoning teams, and while I do see merit in that argument I feel that they are distinct enough that they deserve their own separate discussion.
General structure: Trap point character/Trap assist/Character who benefits the other two in some way
Example: Team Clockw0rk (Strider-B/Sentinel-Y/Dr. Doom-B) – This is a team that utilizes a trap to lock the opponent down and mix them up. Strider’s Ouroboros super creates a ton of projectiles on the screen with every button press the Strider player makes. Combined with Strider’s incredible mobility, having teleports and being able to fly across the screen and into our hearts, this allows for the opponent to constantly be in a guessing game over which way to block. If they guess wrong, they eat a damaging combo followed by a nasty reset or a second Ouroboros activation. Ouroboros combined with Dr. Doom’s rocks assist also provides a frame-perfect lockdown, meaning that Strider can chip his opponents to death if he so desires and has enough meter. This brings us to the first issue of the team, meter. Since Ouroboros is a super, Strider needs to eat a lot of meter in order for his traps to be most effective. This is not that much of a problem since whiffing normals builds meter in MvC2, but eventually Strider will run out of meter and be relatively defenseless until he gets it back, which is dangerous due to Strider’s low health. This is where Sentinel comes in. Sentinel is a very solid character for building meter and does not need any assists to be good (although he is much better with assists as I’ve said before) and he can do a lot of damage and buy a lot of time while building meter and recovering Strider’s health. Sentinel’s Drones assist can also be used as a soft trap with Ouroboros in case Doom dies for whatever reason. Ultimately though, Sentinel/Doom is not as threatening as most other combinations in the modern MvC2 metagame, which is why if Strider dies the team is usually in big trouble.
Other Example: Team Duc (Spiral-A or B/Cable-B/Sentinel-Y) or Banshee (Spiral-A or B/Sentinel-Y/Captain Commando-B) – Spiral teams are in many ways the opposite of Strider teams – Where Strider’s trap consumes meter, Spiral’s trap build’s meter; Where Strider teams are aggressive, Spiral teams are defensive; Where there’s really only one Strider team that works consistently (as far as I know), Spiral teams are a lot looser in their configurations. Spiral’s Dancing Sword move summons six swords around her that she can fling at her opponent to use as either a hit confirm, to chip them out in a trap, or to just control space. Her standing HP also puts the opponent in blockstun for a long time as she hits with all six of her arms, and Sentinel’s Drones assist (or Doom’s rocks) can keep the opponent blocking while Spiral reactivates Dancing Sword, creating a frame-perfect trap. Spiral’s Sword Ring followups to Dancing Sword can also be very effective zoning tools, especially her expanding Sword Ring, which is good for covering space in all directions. Like Strider, Spiral also has solid mobility, with a teleport (though the location you teleport to is fixed) and a quick drop, allowing her to evade heavy pressure (but only to an extent as MSP is still her kryptonite). The third character typically used on a Spiral team is usually one who can provide air cover or use the meter built from Spiral’s traps effectively. Cable fits both of these categories and benefits from Sentinel’s assist, which is why he is typically used on Spiral teams. However, recently (by recently I mean in the past 4 years or so) a Spiral player named Banshee has been playing Captain Commando over Cable to better control air space and allow Sentinel to use meter to perform damaging combos instead. This configuration has the advantage of making Sentinel stronger, which provides a slight advantage against Magneto teams. As mentioned before, Dr. Doom can also be used on Spiral teams, but the other two options are generally considered better.
So yeah, MvC2 is awesome.
MLP:Fighting is Magic livestream archive – 1 hr 40 min total
So I wrote up a long post on the game as I was watching the archive of the livestream (I couldn’t watch the stream live because I completely forgot it was happening) and I figured I’d put it here so I wouldn’t have to search for it anywhere else. So, here it is.
Pinkie – They only showed off two special moves which I guess means that the finger is a normal move? I kind of expect her to have more moves than that. I mean who does she think she is, Guile? Actually she apparently thinks she’s Saki from AH3 with her reverse charge moves. As for the special moves themselves, they’re useful I suppose. The ground bounce Cartwheel Kick seems pretty good and the rest seem alright. The knockdown Cartwheel Kick can lead into her next special move, Be Right Back, a reverse charge move that’s basically designed to mixup your opponent by teleporting. BRB is less effective as a teleport though since the game screen will move over to tell you where she’s coming from. This probably needs to be fixed so that Pinkie can have some mixups that are actually ambiguous and not ones that the opponent can block on reaction. Pinkie could certainly be a very interesting oki character, but her damage needs to be toned down because right now she’s pretty easy mode, doing 30% combos for little effort. Her super seems a bit like a super-charged version of Ibuki’s Kasumi Suzaku and it does ridiculous damage.
What needs to change – Damage, obviously. As is, she’s doing way too much damage for little effort. Almost every match I saw with Pinkie against someone like Rarity or Twilight had the unicorn zoning her out only for Pinkie to get some quick, easy damage in with only a few combos to either catch up or get ahead. That’s pretty ridiculous and obviously needs to get fixed. But aside from that, I think she could actually use some buffs. She’s obviously the least complete of all the characters, and it shows through the fact that she only has two specials. She has no way to deal with attacks from the air, so maybe something like a Flash Kick would help her in this regard. And if you do give her a Flash Kick effect, you might as well give her an up charge move, probably more like a Moonsault kick or some other kind of air combo ender, maybe even a slide like Belial Edge. Also, as I said before, it’s really easy to telegraph where BRB is going because of the way the screen changes. Please fix this, as it makes her mixups easy to read. Like Sesame Street easy.
What needs to stay the same – Pretty much everything else. I really like how Pinkie is a sort of amalgam of lots of other charge based rushdown characters and if BRB is fixed to be more ambiguous then it’ll be great for ambiguous Claw-esque mixups.
Rarity – Rarity reminds me of Shang Tsung more than anyone else. She can definitely create a fireball forest and use her delayed fireballs to pressure or mix up her zoning. Her light fireball seems a bit slow though even though it’s supposed to be the fast one. Calling gems from behind the opponent is useful if cornered though. Her Seismo Gems seem kind of situationally useful, but it looks like they may be her fastest zoning tool. Most importantly are her anti-air gems though. If the pegasi in this game do have flight mode, there will be some players who try to run away with them, and Rarity now has tools to deal with that. However, the fact that they don’t hit grounded opponents at all makes them much less useful outside of anti-airing and ending combos. Her air normals also look really nice and her air combos are fun to watch. She doesn’t seem to have a lot of air-to-ground attack vectors though. I’m loving her super, it’s like an upwards Hail Storm, which is pretty much what I expected, but she can also do it off a throw, which is great. I’m wondering if she can follow up after it with her upwards gems.
What needs to change – Rarity has so many special moves that I’m kind of concerned about overlapping commands. This isn’t too much of a problem for people who actually know how to play fighting games, but most bronies don’t. The other major problem I have is that her purple gem projectile is way too slow. Even the non-delayed version takes a long time to come out, and as I’ll talk about below, this makes Twilight, the well rounded character, better at zoning than Rarity, who is supposed to be a dedicated zoner. I think both of these problems could be solved by consolidating the forwards and backwards purple gems into one move – for example, one version shoots a gem in front of the opponent, one version shoots a gem from behind the opponent, and the other one is a fake or shoots gems from both directions or something (or maybe the EX version shoots gems from both directions…hmm, wouldn’t that be fun?) – having the startup be about the same as Twilight’s projectile, and have the delays done by holding down the button after inputting the command, like with Sakura’s Hadoken or Megaman’s buster. This would also free up a command in her movelist to give an easier input for her AA gems. This is a relatively minor issue though since she can still zone with Seismo and AA gem forest. A bigger concern is her relative inability to escape pressure. Give her an Alpha Counter like Applejack at least.
What needs to stay the same – Her zoning patterns. I play zoners in pretty much every 2D fighting game I play, and I can pretty much say that Rarity’s zoning covers all the angles I’d want it to, which is perfect. I also like how big her hitboxes are on her air moves. These two things combined really remind me of one of my favorite zoners, Nu-13, but unlike Nu, Rarity doesn’t have EZ-Modo combos that do 2K for 0 effort.
Applejack – If Rarity is Shang Tsung, then Applejack is an amalgamation of other Mortal Kombat characters. Her everything about her Applebuck reminds me of Johnny Cage’s Shadow Kick, aside from the wallbounce on the hard version which Cage obviously doesn’t have. Ground Stomps are a bit like Sheeva only with less range but more usefulness. I have to admit, I genuinely laughed when Applejack said “GET OVER HERE!” when she used her lasso. Applejack’s lasso also gives her EX moves, Alpha Counters, and a special 2 bar teleport to get her out of trouble or help her pressure game, which places an importance on it that could be very interesting. And, as the developers pointed out, lassos can also be used as tech traps. She also has followups after super, which really opens up a lot of potential for her combos.
What needs to change – I do think that Applejack needs to be nerfed, but I’m not sure what the best way to go about it is. I think the root of her balance issues comes from her lasso though. The best nerf I can think to give her without completely fucking up her gameplan is to give it more recovery frames on whiff. Obviously this won’t be enough though, as her lasso is currently the best (and also one of the only, now that I think about it) anti-air in the game. Beyond that or reducing the range of a lasso (which would actually really screw her over) or reducing her damage slightly (which might not be so bad), I can’t really think of anything to make her more balanced.
What needs to stay the same – Just about everything else. Applejack is a solid rushdown character, probably the best rushdown you could do without an air dash, and she’s also the closest thing this game has to a grappler thus far. She uses wallbounces and groundbounces very well, can do followups off lassos and supers, and has good tools for pressuring her opponent. The developers running the stream said that the has an invincible command dash that uses 2 pieces of magic and goes through projectiles. I think that this should be her only easy way out of projectiles since it’s a pretty powerful affect against some characters.
Twilight Sparkle – The way Rarity is now, Twilight’s projectiles are much better, which might make Twilight a better zoner overall. Her hard fireball is also a diagonal upwards one to use as an anti-air, like Morrigan or Gouken, so pretty much anything Rarity can do Twilight can do better. Of course, Twilight is obviously much more of a complete character, so who knows. Also, an upwards attack vector was really the one thing she needed to be a complete character. I mean how else would she control space in the air? Launcher? The failed teleport makes it pretty obvious which game they were most influenced by when designing it. Why is heavy the failed teleport though? Wouldn’t it make more sense as light? I suppose it doesn’t really matter though. Oh, and I guess the failed teleport is supposed to be her DP, so she’s now a complete shoto. But is it invincible? Her EX trap is interesting if it eats projectiles. I wonder if this makes it like just a normal projectile or if it’s more like Hakumen’s Black Hole? Also, apparently all her pages take up her magic meter now, which kind of limits her. Her throw game is solid though, with throw into fireball and throw into super both being very good options.
What needs to change – If her fake teleport isn’t invincible, make it so. So many characters in the game need air defense (and they’ll need it even more if the pegasi have air dashes or flight as many have speculated) and Twilight is one of them. I’m also unsure exactly how her EX trap negates projectiles, as I said before, but it would be pretty cool if it was like Hakumen’s Black Hole. She and Rarity (and Pinkie’s Super I guess) are the only characters to have projectiles so far though, so I doubt that’ll even have that much relevance. There’s also the danger of teleport mixups, which I’m assuming is why the developers talked about CPU Twilight as if she were an SNK Boss.
What needs to stay the same – Unlike Applejack and Pinkie, who are a bit overpowered, and Rarity, who is a bit underpowered (compared to the rest of the cast at least), Twilight kind of feels like she’s at just the right balance in the current build. She has a lot of options and chances to mix up the opponent, but she doesn’t do so much damage that she needs to be nerfed. I think they got exactly what they were going for with Twilight – a balanced, shoto-esque character with options for rushing down and zoning (although she’s clearly better at zoning but w/e).
General – Meter building has been lowered and I guess that’s a good thing. In a SF style game, you don’t want people supering all the time or the game will be overly focused on who has the best super. This was arguably one of the major faults of 3rd Strike. However, supers appear to build meter, which they should probably fix because no other game is like that (and for good reason). But, pieces of magic (idk what else to call them) don’t carry over in between rounds, which is pretty interesting. I’m glad to hear that they lowered the framerate for the first video because frankly the game looked incredibly choppy. It’s good that they have techs in the game, but I’m not completely sure it’ll prevent infinites all by itself. One thing that I guess I’ll just have to get used to in this game is the lack of a super flash. Sometimes the combo counter glitches so that only the first digit of the combo displays, which is pretty weird and they should fix it just as a presentational issue. And OH SHIT THERE IS AIR BLOCKING. Wow, I never saw that in any previous video. Maybe there is hope for a Rainbow Air Dash, especially since they confirmed that pegasi will have air mobility options.
What needs to change – For the most part it’s not about “What needs to change” but more like “What I want to see” – Fluttershy and Rainbow Dash in combat, Pinkie’s remaining special moves, and all the missing level 3 supers. The game right now is fine for the most part, but there are still a few things I’d like to see. The combo counter is glitchy as hell. Don’t fix it until the final build though, I always get a good laugh out of it being derpy. In general, I think that more characters need upward attack vectors, as I said time and time again. Right now Applejack is the only one who has one and she seems to be pretty dominant in part because of it. Ways to escape pressure are also not very visible in this build. Alpha Counters should be universal if they’re not already, but if there are still ponies whose pressure games are way too good then bursts may need to be implemented. Also, PUT SPIKE IN THIS GAME HE’S THE BEST CHARACTER IN THE ENTIRE SHOW AND HE’S A TOTAL FIGHTING MACHINE, JUST LOOK AT HIM!
What needs to stay the same – The absence of any sort of bullshit comeback mechanic and the presence of adorable ponies. And in general, the sheer attention to detail on the backgrounds and the ponies’ sprites is just phenomenal. Most fan games tend to be half-assed, but Mane6Dev are really going all out with Fighting is Magic. I’m really looking forward to the next time the game is shown. Maybe I’ll actually get to watch the stream as it airs for once.
Final Thoughts – I can’t believe this game doesn’t support DDR pads as controllers. What a load of shit. Oh well, at least there aren’t any major potential balance issues in the game.
I just don’t have the time.
Yeah, I know the schedule said I was supposed to post this yesterday but the fact is that I just haven’t gotten around to it because I’m a lazy sack of shit and I’m fat and ugly and biased towards American Street Fighter players etc. but I am writing it right now so it’ll be up later today. Until then, enjoy this image that shows the general gist of one of the points I’m planning to discuss.
So I know I posted my opinions and predictions on EVO already a few days ago, but today Shoryuken.com posted brackets for the people in SSFIV:AE and MvC3 who are already seeded, so I thought I’d fill them out and give some quick opinions just for fun.
Super Street Fighter IV: Arcade Edition
Top 8 Rundown
Agree? Disagree? Don’t care? Let me know what you think or post your own brackets in the comments below. I might update this again
Tune in on Friday for my scheduled post about the problem with game reviews.
Note: If you don’t know what “footsies” are in regards to fighting games or what a Roman Cancel is, you may not meet the qualifications to read this article. Might I suggest looking at puppies instead?
One of my favorite genres of games is the fighting game genre. I love the action and competition the genre provides. That’s why this year I’d like to post my opinions about the state of fighting games as a whole and state my predictions of the results of EVO 2011, happening July 29-31 in Las Vegas.
The following games will be the main events at EVO this year, all of which I will give a brief overview of:
Super Street Fighter IV: Arcade Edition
The Street Fighter IV series began in Japanese arcades in 2008 with the release of Street Fighter IV. The game was wildly successful due to its combining of Street Fighter II-style zoning and footsies and Street Fighter III-style combos with an interesting new Focus Attack system, visually stunning ultra attacks, a Roman Cancel-esque system that was
blatantly stolen from influenced by Guilty Gear, and almost the entire Super Street Fighter II Turbo cast as well as several new characters. However, the initial SFIV release was criticized by the fighting game community due to extremely lenient shortcuts, the ability of some characters to be able to land their ultra combo after trading moves, Ultra combos in general as a comeback mechanic, and the fact that several characters were considered overpowered at high levels of play, most notably Sagat.
So, roughly a year after the release of SFIV for home consoles, Capcom produced Super Street Fighter IV, which introduced a whopping ten additional characters (though only two were brand new to the SF series), gave the entire cast a second ultra, and fixed a lot of the balance issues of the game. The game wasn’t perfectly balanced as you still had characters like Gen, Cody, Hakan, and Makoto who suffered from a number of bad matchups and were very hard to use at high levels of play, but for the most part you could pick a character you liked, learn them inside and out, and do well with them (unless you picked Dan, in which case winning probably wasn’t important to you anyway). The balance of SSFIV was so good that people were willing to overlook the fact that it was basically the same game with the same shitty input shortcuts and the same bullshit comeback mechanic ultras, or the fact that Capcom created maybe 6 new characters for the SFIV series (several of whom were heavily based on other characters in the SF series), and play the living shit out of it. It was a ton of fun for a lot of people and it even converted players who weren’t fans of the original SFIV.
Then Arcade Edition came out and brought back Yun and Yang from Street Fighter II: 3rd Strike (I know they originally appeared in New Generation but I just want to get these abbreviations out of the way as soon as possible) as playable characters as well as two “original” characters in the form of Evil Ryu, who is slightly more original than the Street Fighter Alpha series Evil Ryu since he has a HOLE IN HIS CHEST HOLY SHIT, and Oni, who I’d like to call a palette swap of Akuma but his moveset is just barely different enough for him to be a “original” character. Remember how the Scooby Doo series started to go downhill in quality when they introduced Scrappy Doo? That’s what Yun and Yang are like. Yun and Yang, often simply called “The Twins”, are walking balance issues. In retrospect, I really don’t understand how people didn’t see this coming, as they were both very dominant in 3rd Strike. Maybe the community as a whole was just so glad to have them in that they didn’t stop to consider what kind of impact having a super like Genei Jin in addition to an ultra would have on most matchups. Maybe they didn’t realize how easy it was for Yang and Yun to build both super and ultra meter through the use of palm strikes and focus attacks. Maybe the developers were too busy making Street Fighter X Tekken to actually be bothered to balance AE.
But no matter the reason, his heart or his shoes, The Grinch sat at his computer, hating this fucking game. I mean seriously, why would you play this game over other games in the SF series? For pure footsies, ST is better. For combos, 3S is better. For balance, SSFIV is better. There is literally no reason to play AE unless you were a good Yun player in 3S and you want to help scrubs’ wallets lose weight. But the SF community as a whole is incredibly fickle and has to play the very newest thing at all times, no matter how bad it is. What a bunch of sheep.
Who I think will win: Daigo Umehara. There have been two SFIV-series EVO championships so far and Daigo has won both. Now in AE he’s playing the best character in the game, so Americans stand even less of a chance. I’m not a Daigo fan or hater, but the reality is that unless something absolutely astonishing happens Daigo will win AE. Period.
Who I want to win: Wolfkrone. The man is one of the hardest working people in the SF community and doesn’t accept any failure from himself. Even if he gets second place at a tournament, he’ll go home sad that he didn’t win. He’s that kind of person and he has the exact mentality that the American community as a whole needs to succeed over the Japanese. PR Balrog is also very dedicated to this game, and I’d like to see him do well too.
Marvel vs Capcom 3
Speaking of over-hyped things, let’s talk about the disappointing sequel to a game that came out ten years ago. Now when I say disappointing, I’m not complaining about the fact that it was inevitably going to be disappointing after a decade of hype (I understand this logic but it doesn’t apply to everything), nor am I complaining about the netcode (why would you play fighting games online anyway?), and I’m also not complaining about my favorite character not being in the game (he is, although ever since they nerfed his health he hasn’t been that fun to play as). I’m talking about everything that’s wrong with the game from a competitive balance standpoint. Now there’s a ton of things wrong with this game so I’m not going to go over everything, but I will go over the biggest ones right now.
One issue in the game is the very same issue Capcom said they were going to get right with this game – character balance. Now I’m not going to waste time talking about the underpowered characters in the game. Since MvC3 is a team game, a weaker member of the team can be balanced out by having strong characters to back them up. So unless you’re playing something like Chris/MODOK/Viewtiful Joe, you’ll be able to run a lower tier character on a team and still be able to come out on top. However, one character is so good that you can run whoever you want with her and still do incredibly well. I am talking, of course, about Phoenix.
For those who don’t know, Phoenix is absurdly good at both rushdown and zoning in MvC3, like some combination of Strider and Storm from MvC2. Her teleport mixups are ridiculous, her blockstrings are extremely good, and her “weakness” of low health isn’t really a weakness at all for reasons I’ll discuss soon. On top of that, when she dies with 5 meters she gets even better. She’s effectively a comeback machine and playing against her requires most players to completely change their gameplan. In level 3 X-Factor, which I’ll talk more about soon, Phoenix is ridiculously powerful ans can wipe out whole teams on her own, even if you only have a very basic grasp of the character. This isn’t just me being a scrub and complaining either, Phoenix has been incredibly dominant at high-level tournament play, to the point where a typical top8 has at least 3 or 4 Phoenix players. Now I know I’ve been complaining, but there are some smart design choices that went into making Phoenix. One such choice is in her teleport. Phoenix cannot use her teleport to run away, as all three versions of her teleport leave Phoenix right next to (or on top of) her opponent. This means that Phoenix needs to be ready with a blockstring and she has to hope that her opponent doesn’t hit her out of it with an invincible move.
In this game, for every good design choice Capcom makes, they make at least two bad ones, and the worst design choice by far is X-Factor. Remember how I said people criticized Ultras in SFIV as a comeback mechanic? Well that was nothing, nothing, compared to X-Factor. X-Factor is, to put it moderately, completely balls to the wall ridiculous. Let’s look at a list of things X-Factor is:
Now on paper this doesn’t seem that bad. There are some worrisome parts, sure, but most of them make sense. Roman Cancels are in there because Guilty Gear was a cool game. Melty Blood is also a cool game and the MvC series already uses red health, so it makes sense that a health regeneration mechanic would be included too. Chip damage isn’t fun for new players, so nobody really cares if it goes. Resetting damage and hitstun scaling doesn’t really have any purpose aside from making cool combo videos, and that’s what really matters, right? In practice though, X-Factor is a catastrophe. It’s either burned off quickly to kill your opponent’s whole team or it’s saved until your very last character to make them as powerful as possible and wipe out your opponent’s entire team. The damage and speed boosts are seemingly random too with some characters not getting very significant changes until Level 3 X-Factor and others getting absurdly powerful. What’s more, X-Factor is integral to the balance of this game. Whenever discussion of a character happens, one of the things that’s brought up is “good in level 3 X-Factor”, regardless of whether the character being discussed is good without X-Factor or not. On top of all this, in Ultimate Marvel vs Capcom 3, X-Factor not only has these boosts but you can do it in the air. Come on, Capcom, I thought you were proud of the fact that you listened to your fanbase.
To me, everything about X-Factor and most aspects of MvC3 in general is really lazy. Players who are too lazy to learn how to block well and deal with pressure situations can X-Factor on their last character and still come back and win. Players too lazy to learn long combos or complex resets can X-Factor and repeat the combo they just did for over double the damage. Players who want to be good with minimal effort can pick Phoenix. But there’s just as much blame to be put on Capcom too. Online play might not work with a 3 on 3 fight, so they gave us only the bare minimum. Balancing was too strenuous, so they gave everyone a broken button. People don’t like it when they lose two characters to their own stupid mistakes, so they gave everyone the most overpowered comeback mechanic of all time. Everything about this game screams bad design. I’ll probably do a full review of this game eventually because there’s just so much wrong with it that I don’t have time to go into everything here. Most of the community is starting to realize that this game is bananas too, as many Marvel vs Capcom 2 pros have quit the game.
Ten more years? At the rate this is going, I’ll be surprised if it lasts for ten more months.
(That is, ten months after UMvC3 comes out, because god forbid the Capcom Fighting Game community ignores a new game no matter how much it sucks)
Who I think will win: Justin Wong. The best and most successful MvC2 player of all time has been doing incredibly well in MvC3 as well, winning nearly every major tournament he’s ever entered. His team is also incredibly strong, using the powerful combination of Wolverine and Akuma, which many players hate as much as or more than Phoenix. In the rare event that Justin doesn’t win, however, the winners will most likely be Phoenix players. The two best Phoenix players I can think of at the moment are Clockw0rk and Filipino Champ, both of who are very solid players with very strong Phoenixes, so if Justin does not win one of them likely will. A lot of people are concerned about American players’ chance of winning since both Daigo and Tokido are entering MvC3. However, the Japanese have historically not done well at MvC3 since, unlike most other 2D fighters, the Marvel vs Capcom games are more about resets, positioning, and meter management than just combos. I have no doubt that Justin, who is a veritable encyclopedia of MvC, will have little trouble beating Daigo in MvC if it comes down to that. Tokido, however, is a very skilled player and a notorious tier whore who plays Wolverine/Sentinel/Phoenix, so he may actually be the biggest threat in MvC3 to come from Japan.
Who I want to win: EMP Mugetsu, if he’s going to EVO this year. I always liked Mugetsu as a player and I never really knew why he wasn’t successful in this game. He has good execution, extensive knowledge of his characters, and is just a good player overall. Fanatiq is also a player who I really want to win – he seems to have pushed Magneto/Storm/Sentinel to its limits in MvC3 and he’s an old-school MvC2 vet. But if Mugetsu and Fanatiq don’t go (and I have no idea if he will or not) then I’ll probably want Justin Wong to win. Though really I’ll cheer for anyone who’s not Japanese or playing Phoenix.
Yeah…I’m not gonna lie, I don’t know shit about Tekken.
I like watching people play it because of the unique footsies and spacing involved, but when I go to play the game it’s like a six year old stumbling through calculus. I will say this though: Rage mode is bullshit. For those who don’t know about Rage mode, it’s a condition that automatically triggers whenever a character is at about 10% of their maximum health or so and gives them a 50% damage increase. Not the worst comeback mechanic (**cough**X-FACTOR**cough**) but it’s still bullshit.
Who I think will win: The Koreans or the Japanese.
Who I want to win: The Americans.
BlazBlue: Continuum Shift II
BlazBlue: Calamity Trigger was a fun spiritual successor to the Guilty Gear franchise. For those of you who don’t know what Guilty Gear is, it’s a fun but execution-intensive game with a gorgeous anime-influenced art style, an awesome rock soundtrack, and a community that has in the past been completely disrespected by the SF community for no adequate reason. BBCT was similar to Guilty Gear in a lot of ways, had great netcode, and was beginner friendly without being dumbed down, so naturally I played it about 5 times as much as SFIV back in the summer of 2009. However, there were problems with the game but fortunately they only stemmed from the balance of a few characters, which was easy to fix since the game only had 12 characters and there weren’t any un-winnable matchups anyway.
The rebalancing came in the form of BlazBlue: Continuum Shift last summer with many characters being nerfed or buffed as needed but there were still some balance issues in that version too. Not as much rebalancing was needed though, as since CT had three characters (Rachel, Nu-13, and Arakune) who needed balancing out of 12, CS only needed to balance two characters (Bang and Litchi) out of 15 (not including DLC characters). Now in BlazBlue: Continuum Shift II (aka. “the balance patch”) the cast is so well balanced that there are almost no characters that stand out from others in terms of how good they are, and I mean this in a “this game is really balanced while still having diverse characters and it’s really fun to play because of that” way and not a “they nerfed everyone into oblivion so now nobody is fun to play” way.
However, in situations like these where every character is viable at a competitive level, the most likely ones to be successful are the popular ones, simply because there are more of them. Of the characters in BBCSII, the most popular one right now seems to be Makoto. Makoto is popular for her fairly safe rushdown style, her mixup abilities, her ability to punish normals, and the fact that she looks like Alvin and the Chipmunks’ wet dream (and believe me, that’s about as SFW as Makoto gets). She also has a good damage output and excellent super meter building skills. So why aren’t I complaining about her? Well, she’s honestly not that unbalanced. It’s not as easy to zone her as it is to zone some other characters but once you do she can’t really do much about it, once you read her mixups you can hit her out of them, and she can’t deal with being pressured as well as other characters in the game without the use of a guess parry. She’s just not as dominant as Yang, Yun, or Phoenix are in their respective games.
Who I think will win: Makoto players. The most recent major to have BBCS2 as an event had double Makoto grand finals, and I doubt that the results from EVO will be much different.
Who I want to win: Lambda players. Gotta side with my main here. I would also want Mike Z to win so that he can show our puny American minds some real Soviet damage, but at this point all I want him to do is finish making SkullgirlS.
Mortal Kombat 
If you had told me a year ago that the game I would be most excited to see at EVO was Mortal Kombat, I would have laughed at you and then probably poured my drink out on your head and kicked you in the groin because that’s the kind of asshole I am. Nobody expected MK9 to be even remotely good since the series as a whole has had a history of being about as competitively viable as rock paper scissors, only once in a while paper throws a spear at rock and yells “GET OVER HERE!”. It’s extremely refreshing, then, that the most recent iteration of Mortal Kombat, called MK9 by fighting game fans, is quite possibly even better than SSFIV:AE.
YEAH THAT’S RIGHT I SAID IT.
Well alright, let me explain. MK9 does have input shortkuts like SF4 does, but the way the inputs have worked throughout the series it’s about the same as what you’d expect from a Mortal Kombat game and definitely not as lenient as SFIV. On top of that, the development team has been working very hard with the kommunity to make patch after patch to improve the balance of the game more and more, so characters that were initially overpowered (Kung Lao for example) have been nerfed to a reasonable level. The gameplay is also just plain fun. It has the 2D footsies and zoning of a Street Fighter game with the juggling system of a Tekken game along with bursts from Guilty Gear (though in practice they operate a bit more like Mega Crashes from Tatsunoko vs Capcom).
Ironikally, where the game fails the most is in the single player mode, which is probably the single mode that matters least in a fighting game. The one important single player mode that MK9 fails at the most is the most important one – training mode. Training mode in MK9 is atrociously bad with very few options for the dummy. Being able to rekord the dummy is something that has been in fighting games since the Dreamcast era but MK9 totally botched it up by making the rekord funktion only useful for showing replays of sick kombos and not actually practicing said sick kombos. The story is also a joke, but it’s a fighting game so who gives a shit.
Overall, MK9 is an excellent game and I love it. The only thing that irks the kompetitive player in me is how easy it is to do X-Rays – you literally push two buttons at the same time. This kind of takes away one of the more difficult aspekts of doing kombos into supers in a fighting game – the exekutional barrier. Making it so easy to do X-Rays on reaction kind of takes away the exekutional elements of the game, which I imagine is why many players don’t like the it. Still, I think the game is fantastic and I can’t wait to watch it.
And yes, I am going to spell everything with a hard “C” sound with a “K” while talking about MK. Kan you handle it?
Who I think will win: EMP Tom Brady (and for those of you who don’t know the MK9 scene, this is not the New England Patriots’ quarterback). Tom Brady is to MK what Justin Wong is to MvC. The man is a walking encyklopedia of knowledge on the game and has already won or almost won several majors. However, he’s not invincible and there are a lot of SF players who are picking up the game and doing well, so we’ll see.
Who I want to win: EMP Tom Brady. Not only is he a great player, but he’s also very helpful in fostering the kommunity and helping it grow. He worked with the development team at NetherRealm Studios to balance the game and has a semi-weekly podcast where he answers questions from inquiring minds. He’s really just a great guy all around and he deserves to go home with the MK9 2011 trophy.
EVO 2011 Panels
Yes, for the first time ever, EVO is having panels. I guess they thought that their tournament wasn’t enough like an anime convention.
Panel #1 – Feed the Stream Monsters: A Guide to Broadcast Fighting Games
As a stream monster myself, I find the title of this very offensive. Stream monsters can be very productive contributors to the community. Now if you’ll excuse me, I have to go make fun of Chris Hu’s accent.
Panel #2 – SkullgirlS: A New Age of Heroines
Get it? Because MvC2 was subtitled “A New Age of Heroes”? Yeah, I don’t think it’s clever either. Anyway, SkullgirlS looks amazing but the one thing I want to hear from them more than anything else is a fucking release date.
Panel #3 – Inside the Mind of the Beast: Daigo Umehara Exposed!
I honestly couldn’t care less. I really couldn’t. I think everyone makes too much of a big deal out of Daigo as it is.
Panel #4 – Marvel vs Capcom 3: Past, Present, and Future
This really doesn’t matter since by EVO everyone will already know about the future of MvC3 (or rather UMvC3) because of the SDCC announcements. All we can hope for is character announcements, but really the only character people wanted was Strider and he’s in UMvC3 (but man did they fuck him up – Ouroboros as a level 3 is a sick joke).
Panel #5 – The King of Fighters XIII: Panel and Discussion
I would like to know more about the game so yeah I guess you could say I’m looking forward to this one.
Panel #6 – Street Fighter III: Online Edition, Reinventing a Classic
You know what they could give us that I’d be interested in? A release date. Never mind, they already announced the release date so I have nothing to care about here.
Panel #7 – Namco Bandai: Get Ready For The Next Panel!
I’m not that interested in Soulcalibur V, but I am interested in Tekken Tag Tournament 2.
Panel #8 – New Directions in Street Fighter X Tekken
Another upcoming game I’m excited about. After all this comeback mechanic bullshit with Rage mode in Tekken and Ultras in SF, it’s nice to see a comparatively normal game that doesn’t have any ridiculously centralizing comeback mechanics to upset the bal- WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS SHIT!?!
I gotta say, these panels are at the very least very relevant to new fighting game releases. Except for the Daigo interview, I thought that was kinda stupid and unnecessary.
Other EVO Stuff
Balrog: Behind the Glory
Who gives a shit?
Street Fighter III: 3rd Strike Invitational
I’m definitely looking forward to this. Here’s the list of players I want to see:
I want to see a good amount of character diversity but at the same time I also want to see the best players. It’s a shame Kuroda and MOV aren’t coming, I’d definitely want to see both of them play in this invitational.
East Coast vs West Coast MvC3 5-on-5
So far the teams haven’t been announced, but we do know that the captains for the East Coast and West Coast teams are NerdJosh and Justin Wong respectively. Here are my predictions for what the teams are actually going to be.
Since Justin Wong is the West Coast captain and lives in SoCal, I’m expecting the team to be mostly consisting of SoCal players. However this is not a bad thing because right now SoCal has some of the best players in the game, including the best, Justin Wong, and his teammate, Floe. Clockw0rk and Filipino Champ are also going to be mainstays of the team since they are arguably the two best players of the best character in the game, Phoenix. I would have listed Marn on this team, but since he not only is not the best choice but also hates the game, I thought that Combofiend would be the most likely 5th member of the team.
East Coast I’m less sure about. Obviously NerdJosh would have to be stupid not to pick Chris G and Ry Ry, who are two of the best on the coast. However, the rest of the coast is roughly the same in terms of skill and no one in particular stands out besides them. PR Balrog seems to be a likely choice but I’m not sure if he plays the game anymore. Marlin Pie is extremely talented and he plays C. Viper, a character which few people know how to deal with, but he hasn’t made strong placings in majors. Evil Rahsaan is in a similar predicament, in that he uses Spider-Man, a character who has the tools to deal with Phoenix and Wolverine (thought not much else), but Rahsaan has also made sub-par tournament placings. This leaves Jago, Smooth Viper, Josh Wong, and Noel Brown, all of whom are strong players but also around the same skill level, so it’s kind of hard to guess who will be on the team. Honestly, I think the weakest point of this team in NerdJosh, who has never performed particularly well in tournaments. Josh’s insistence on using Tron instead of, say, anyone else also hurts his team, as a good assist is nothing in MvC3 unless the character can also perform well on point.
Of course it doesn’t particularly matter because I’m also predicting that regardless of who is on the East Coast team, West Coast will win for one reason – Justin Wong. It is not hyperbole to say that Justin is the best MvC3 player in the world and because of this he is the single biggest factor in this 5 on 5. Justin has beaten everyone else I’ve named here in tournament or money matches in this game in the past, East Coast and West Coast. And frankly, because I am so confident that this will be the outcome, I’m not going to bother watching it. I’ll probably watch some MvC2 games instead, like Duc vs Sanford, Neo vs Clockw0rk, or Fanatiq vs Toan.
Wireless Controllers Banned
Is this bullshit? I say yes…to an extent. On one hand, I think that if a player qualified for EVO playing on pad then they should be able to play on a pad at EVO. On the other hand, there are some fairly easy workarounds, which the EVO website even outlines. I don’t play on pad so this wouldn’t affect me, but this is still a problem. Then again, I guess if anyone had a wireless arcade stick they probably wouldn’t be allowed to use that at EVO for the same reasons.
Whenever Gootecks lands a combo I’m going to yell out “THERE YOU GO GOOTECKS!”
Play ’em off, Keyboard CrossCounter!
Join me next week when I talk about The Problem With Game Reviews.
So before I even start, no, these are not rules for commenters. You guys can talk about whatever you want in the comments. Keep in mind that I do have to approve them though, so if you try to post something too obscene (read: illegal) or if I feel like screwing with your head, I won’t approve your comment.
No, these rules are for me. These will serve as a set of guidelines for me to use on this blog so that eventually when this blog turns into a gaming media empire and ultimately leads to my tragic downfall, you’ll know that Rosebud was my sled. Anyway, here they are.
1. I will post content at least once a week every week.
As someone who spends
too much a lot of time on the internet myself, I know that it can be incredibly frustrating when something you like a lot doesn’t update for months or weeks at a time. I’m not going to say any names VGCats but I think we all know web series like that and hate it when they have an unreasonably long time between updates. If people actually do read my blog, I want to make sure that they enjoy reading it and have something new to read on a weekly basis. Until they post comments that is. Then Imma fuck ’em up.
2. I will not write articles longer than ten pages.
Just as my previous point was about not being like VGCats, this point is about not being like certain other overly-verbose game reviewers. A specific example of this I can give is actionbutton.net. Now the people who write for action button dot net are clearly very intelligent human beings and their reviews are very well written and full of intelligent observations on games and the gaming industry. But if they even have an editor at their site, he should be fired for not doing his job. There are reviews that are concise, to the point, and at the same time illustrative of all of a game’s good and bad points, and then there are 32 page rants that constantly go off on tangents to talk about the issue of having numbers in a game and compare Final Fantasy games to Tekken. And that’s not even including Tim Rogers’ favorite story about when he was at the Japanese FFXII launch and some asshole who Tim apparently thinks is indicative of all FF fans (but is really just some asshole) told Yoichi Wada to remake FFVII for the PS3. That story, which Tim Rogers tells nearly every day at every opportunity (FPS reviews, picking up girls, funeral eulogies), takes up a mere page in the article, and the rest of it is just a meandering train-wreck-of-though. This is not good games journalism, good reviewing, or even good from an academic standpoint. It’s just a giant mess and I’m going to spend the next 15 pages talking about it while making dubious comparisons to Spider-Man comic books and posting an Excel spreadsheet at random to somehow prove my point.
Ha, just kidding. But seriously, I hate reading reviews that are longer than the US Constitution no matter how well written they are. When I’m reading game reviews, I just want a thorough discussion of the game, not a fucking dissertation. If I can’t manage to fit something into ten pages, I’ll either cut stuff out until it does fit or I’ll make it a multi-part article or series of articles.
3. I will be objective when reviewing games.
I’ll discuss this point more in a future article when I talk about the problem with game reviews in general, but generally when I read a lot of reviews I find a lack of objectivity, with reviewers often comparing games to other games and talking about external factors like development cycle or business scandals or the weather or other arbitrary bullshit that doesn’t really affect the game itself at all. The latter is particularly notable of late since Duke Nukem Forever was [finally] released to the chorus of “they spent 15 years on this shit?” as if having an absurdly long development cycle was supposed to make a game good. Remember Too Human from all the way back in 2008? That had a 9-year development cycle and it was also a really shitty game. I can’t think of any game that has been stuck in development for 5 or more years that hasn’t been a pile of feces aside from Team Fortress 2, which went through an engine change and a complete visual overhaul during development while the development team was busy making about 5 other games as well.
But I’ll save more of that for later when I talk about problems with game reviews. What I’m trying to get at here is that when I review games (which I will start doing sometime next month), my review score and opinion of the game will be based solely on the game itself. Sure, I may talk about external factors related to the game (especially if I ever review Nintendo games), but know that they will not affect my score. If commenters end up being exceptionally dense about not realizing what I don’t factor into the game’s overall score, I may even add a section to each review saying “The following does not affect my opinion of the game or the review score, shitheads“. I will also focus only on the main mode of the game, and I’ll explain what that means soon.
4. I will abuse my commenters like… OK I can’t think of a good simile, but I’ll show nothing but complete disdain for them (read: you).
I bet you think you’re actually doing me a favor by reading this, you self-important sack of shit. I don’t give a damn about your fucking feelings, faggot. Don’t you have anything better to do with your life than sitting on your fat, diseased ass commenting on some shit that doesn’t mean a dick-guzzling thing in the grand scheme of the universe? Why don’t you go get a god damn job or take a long walk off a short pier you lazy fucking asshole.
5. I reserve the right to break my own rules at any time.
Some people may misinterpret this as just blatant trolling.
… well, it is blatant trolling, but it’s not JUST that.
See, this is just a free site that I’m using to talk about what I love. I don’t want it to get too serious or else it’ll feel like a second job to me. And frankly as long as I’m not getting paid to review games and my site isn’t being counted by Metacritic or Gamerankings, I have no obligation to be professional about this. I’m so not obligated to be professional that I’m not even wearing pants right now!
However, this doesn’t mean that I won’t take these rules or my game reviews seriously. I plan to put a lot of effort into these reviews and because of that I’ll need to at least appear professional and present my opinion in an organized way. However, it’s easier to put in this disclaimer in case I do slip up and don’t follow my own rules as a means of
covering my own ass allowing exceptions to these rules.
Join me next week when I give my EVO 2011 Opinions and Predictions.